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TBH it sounds like they are running into parts shortages due to manufacture supply issues. This is happening in a lot of places. They probably were silent on the matter in hopes to keep you calm because they couldn’t give a real time frame as to when they could expect the part as this is starting to become lottery based in a lot of places now. Unfortunately you were unlucky that the replacement part was either misdiagnosed or there’s more to the problem.
The loaner issue is legitimate. My dealer requires us to reserve them about a week in advance. They are likely all shelled out to customers at the given time. I can come in and drop off any time but I would need a ride back home via Uber or a friend unless I schedule a good bit out.
I know this isn’t what you want to hear, but the days of customer receiving the utmost service out of their dealer are gone. You’re going to have to be patient and play by their rules, especially right now.
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